Thursday, May 27, 2010

what's wrong with me?

It’s probably odd that my lust for a cool motorcycle has not decreased since my dad’s death (from a motorcycle accident) 6 months ago. What’s more perplexing is that there’s a chance it has actually increased a little bit lately.

Let me explain a bit.

First of all, I can’t explain a bit. I can’t explain it. That’s what’s brought me to start writing this post. Exploring the possible explanations in writing. But let me clarify what background points I can. I miss my dad a lot. I think about him often. I changed my facebook profile picture to an old teenage photo of him because I like glancing at it several times a day. He reminds me why I am who I am, and it’s fun to realize how much we have in common. Even though he passed away on his bike, there’s always been something about riding that I felt connected me to him, even years ago. The irony now probably tortures my mom.

I bet some of my psychologist/therapist readers are having a hay day with the theory that I lust after motorcycles because of his accident. Although I admit that I do not understand all of the inner workings of the sub-psyche, I honestly believe (and hope) that this isn’t rooted in, or even related to, a subconscious self-destructive tendency. My quest for the perfect motorcycle for me is nothing new. But it’s still surprising me that it has not diminished in the slightest since suddenly losing my dad. In defense of my sanity, any motorcycle lusting boy will back me up on the fact that motorcycle lust always spikes when the weather warms up - spring and early summer. This is where we are now. Coming up on Memorial Day this weekend. This is textbook. I am not sick. (Right?)

I’ll further clarify that I am not in the financial position to buy a bike anytime soon anyway. In case you were wondering if I was about go out and act on my lust.

Even if I were in the financial position, it’s too soon. My mom would say that any day is too soon, and I’d be lying if I denied that this lingering knowledge will keep me far away from ownership for quite a while. I ache for her, and can’t bring myself to even be misinterpreted as disrespecting her feelings by going out and getting a bike anytime soon. Or maybe as long as she’s alive, which I suspect and hope will be a long, long time.

I’ll further clarify that when I say I lust after a motorcycle, it’s not just any motorcycle. It’s a very specific style that makes me drool. Somewhere around the vicinity of this. These are relatively tame and practical death machines. Yes, I know I just wrote “tame and practical death machines.” That’s why I also wrote “relatively.”

So, I’m not sure where I’ve landed with this exploration, but I’m glad we had this talk. I’m going to go get in my broken air conditioning, “check engine” lit, relatively gas guzzling 5-passenger car all by myself and drive home on this beautiful summer evening.

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Sunday, May 16, 2010


The lady next to me is either wearing a polar bear or an eskimo that was wearing a polar bear.

Sent from the robot in my pocket.

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Saturday, May 15, 2010

Contentment is...

Sitting in my paris hotel bed, feat aching from walking at least 15 clicks today, eating Ritter Sport from munich, REM live concert on TV, meeting a friend for crepes in the morning, then off to my home where the heart is.

Work hard, play hard = contentment.


Sent from the robot in my pocket.

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Tuesday, May 11, 2010

I will do embarrassing things for airline miles.

I watched "Up in the Air" on the to Frankfurt on Sunday night (from Denver, that's a 9.5 hour flight). I got a window seat on purpose, hoping i could prop up against wall and sleep. Little did I know this man would be sitting next to me.

[insert picture of very wide German dude]

I'll never find the perfect picture for that. Anyway, I like that movie. It got me thinking about how I changed my flight from some other airine to Luftahansa b/c they are partners with United and i've switched my frequent flier goals from American to United and blah blah blah. There I was, pretty uncomfortable, but happy as a clam, because I was on my way to Munich and then Paris. This is no boondoggle, but it makes me really happy to actually use my German for work. So bring on the work, because I feel at home here. Heck, I lived in Germany, including Munich, for more of my adult live then I lived in Miami. Or Philadelphia, or Michigan, or California. And I call some of those places "home." I've even been issued drivers licenses from three of those states. (But never Utah, despite my recent use of "heck.")

Anyway, I'm jetlagged. It's pretty late here and i'm writing this in an attempt to bore myself into a 4 hour coma. But that's not working, because my mind is not bored. Maybe the blog will time stamp this post and reveal just how late. Maybe it will do it in mountain time and make you find a world time zone map online and do the math. We'll see.

I'm off to Paris on Thursday morning. More work, but i'm really looking forward to it because i've never been, and I think there are a large group of people that subconsciously don't believe you're a cultured or traveled adult if you haven't been to Paris. I desperately long to be accepted by these elite elitists, so I'm off to Paris to prove my worth. I will buy a baguette and take a horribly embarrassing picture of myself raising it to the Parisian heavens, perfectly encrusted (like the baguette) by the outline of the Eiffel Tower behind me. Then I'll show those snooty American Chez Luis pancreas eating exclusivites they have some french-american cultural relations to repair, so get off my back. I have my own club. And we fly coach, baby.

Oh, and I don't drink wine when I'm in Paris or beer when in Bavaria. So I can't really be taken seriously in either of these places anyway.

Anyway, even though I'm more than stoked to be here for work, and it's been a professional goal of mine to use my German and travel abroad on professional assignments, I wish I could at least share my hotel room with Jaime and let her explore museums and history and buildings and food and stuff while I worked, then catch late dinners with her when available. Jaime has a cute habit of picking up and randomly practicing German phrases like "Wie kommt Mann in die Hauptbahnhof?" And "Ich habe den besten Mann aller Zeit!" So natürlich I wish I could afford to bring here here. For this reason, I made her a little tour of the München Hauptnahnhof as I walked around tonight. See video below.

And I have a feeling I'm going to really wish she could be with me in Paris. Since Jaime will be in Ohio, and Annie's taken care of (thanks Ben and Bree), I'll take Saturday, my last day in Europe, to explore Paris by myself and fly home Sunday morning. I'll probably just hit up the Orsay museum, Notre Dame, and Eiffel Tower and otherwise eat three or four tasty, but hopefully affordable meals. Maybe I'll rent a bicycle to get around. Yes, That could be good. Pray for good weather. It's been raining in Munich all week and I hear it's going to snow in Boulder tomorrow. The law of averages suggests that Paris be 72 and sunny on Saturday.

The law of averages also suggests that I get to sleep, to make up for the time that i've been awake. If that makes sense. Gute Nacht.

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Sunday, May 9, 2010

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

May the fourth be with you.

Graphic inspiration

A couple months ago, i scoured the interwebs for random bits of inspiration for how i may want my next album art to appear.These images are a sampling of those. See and download the full gallery on posterous. I've sent them off to the great Michael Croxton and he's working on something original and appropriate for me. That's why they pay him the big bucks. Stay tuned!

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